Judy's Thursday Dish #50 (Served Cold)

I had a bizarre afternoon -- I helped my dad write his obituary. It wasn't sad; we actually laughed a lot about it. But my brain hurts. I need a good distraction, so here's some cold Dish. 50 Dishes -- can you believe it?!!

John and I were talking to our friend, Camille, last night and she said she was anxious for my take on that Carrie Prejean chick. I've got a hungry family coaxing me off the computer, so this is going to be my one and only topic this week.

At first, I felt sorry for Carrie Prejean. She was pretty much railroaded for stating that marriage should be reserved for a man and woman. Now, by beauty pageant standards, I think she should have said it with a little more finesse as to not offend anyone, but I totally agree she should have the right to say how she feels without getting lambasted. Then followed all the craziness of whether or not she was meeting her obligations to the Miss California organization, blah blah blah. But then there was the lawsuit, the semi-nude photos and the of-course-it-was-bound-to-come-out sex tape. Sympathy gone. She's just a mess.

And to blow a Larry King interview? Puh-leez. King just phones it in. He reminds me of the TV host on "Reality Bites" played by Frasier's dad who doesn't even read his cue cards before the show starts, so Winona Ryder's character conveniently gets him to say (real) inappropriate stuff due to his lack of preparation. King is the softest interview around. He asked her a logical question. He pursued it, yes, but she's a Pageant winner. Aren't they supposed to handle grace under pressure? Or at least fake it? She could have said some pat answer and he would've moved on. And to tell him he's inappropriate? Um, inappropriate would be asking the details about the sex tape -- or pulling his pants off. He even looked shocked by her behavior, which is strange since he usually only has two or three expressions. Even Jerry Seinfeld showed more grace when Larry King forgot his show was off the air. What an idiot! If you didn't see it, check it out...

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That's it for this week!

My Dad

There is so much I've wanted to post, but I haven't known where to start. So I want to write about my sweet dad.

While we were in California, he was hospitalized. I had made him an appointment before I left, because he was really struggling with fluid in his lungs. Quite a while ago, he was diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure, but when I took him up to LDS Hospital in August, the cardiologist (who I thought was going to be all great and helpful, because he was hot and British, I was thinking "House") declared his heart was just fine. Dad's fantastic primary care physician, Dr. Parkin, disagreed and said he knew there was problems with his heart, even if the latest tests didn't point to Congestive Heart Failure. He also had borderline kidney failure.

Now, here is a man who has survived so many things. He was never sick a day in his life. Almost instantly after he retired as publisher from the Deseret News in 2000, his overworked body caught up with him and he started having multiple health problems. He's had diabetes for years, but he was soon diagnosed with Parkinson's Disease. He's endured 2 major back surgeries, a period of time where he had to use a feeding tube for a year, and survived 2 pulmonary embolisms, which should have killed him. This, on top of diabetic comas, falls, etc., we always joke that he has 9 (or more) lives. Dad being rushed to the hospital isn't uncommon. We are actually kind of used to it.

But when I heard that Dr. Parkin admitted him to LDS hospital while I was in California, I knew this was different. This last year, especially since Spring, he's been really declining. While he was at the hospital, they did many tests on him. They pumped 23 lbs. of fluid out of and around his lungs. They determined that his heart was much worse than those tests in August (I suspect Dr. Not-At-All-Like-House missed something). His right side of the heart was alright -- just aging, but his left side was almost shot. The doctor said it was some of the highest (meaning bad) numbers she had seen. They were worried he would get aspiration pneumonia due to food particles stuck in his bronchial tubes and suggested he have a feeding tube to keep him alive.

This is when my dad, prayerfully and thoughtfully, decided he was done with all these life saving treatments. He said that "being alive" doesn't mean you are happy, running, playing ball or dancing. It may keep you alive, but it doesn't build a lifestyle that makes you happy. He decided he would go under hospice care and enjoy the rest of the time he had left, so he could leave "with a smile on his face." His doctor wholeheartedly agreed and said he could go fairly quickly -- a few days or hang on for a few months.

That was 2 1/2 weeks ago. He was released from the hospital and admitted to CareSource in Holladay, the hospice residence, where he stayed for 48 hours. Since he didn't have unmanageable symptoms and he wanted to go home, they released him to have hospice at home care. It didn't take longer than another 48 hours for him to realize he really should go back to CareSource for full care. He's on the waiting list (now he's #1) to get in, but he's had great care at home with a CNA coming in every morning, nurse visits, social worker visits and help from my mom, Jimmy and Libby who live there and us kids, and his ward family.

He's not in pain, just very uncomfortable. It's so strange to see a body shut down and in a way, how long it can hold on under such duress. His mobility is almost completely gone. Since the hospital, he can't even stand without help. He's totally coherent and in most ways, still very much Jim. He's completely disobeying all the doctor's orders about food -- he says he wants to eat what he wants while he can! He really wanted to go up to Maddox in Brigham City one last time, so we went up with him, my mom, my younger siblings, their spouses and my nephews, Mitchell and Jack, for a Saturday afternoon lunch. He totally loved it! We're just helping him be comfortable, happy and enjoying spending time with him.

I've been so blessed during this time. I've been with him almost every day since we came back from California. For once, I actually feel like I'm giving back just a little for all he gave to me. It's been completely overwhelming and at times -- very hard. This is one of the worst things we will all go through in our lives. However, I've had a lot of peace and seen God's tender mercies all around me. I've been led by the Spirit to be at the right places, at the right times -- or to be inspired to remember things which I know I normally wouldn't -- or be impressed that I need to take notes or take action on something.

I could go on and on, but I've written enough. So many of my friends and family have inquired about how we're doing and expressed they are thinking about us and praying for us. Thank you for your kindness. It's reassuring to know we have such a great support system during difficult times.

Jude's Thursday Dish #49

Hi All. Quickly checking in. I can't even begin to start explaining about my life right now, but I'd like to at least enjoy a little Dish. Here are some quick bits:

- Have you seen the Office's webisodes for "Subtle Sexuality" -- the girl group Kelly and Erin formed? Very funny.

- For the record, I have not watched "Gossip Girl" since last season. Now they are doing a 3-some episode, I want everyone to know that I do NOT watch it.

- Speaking of what I'm watching, my DVRed shows are my only release. I've dumped a lot of shows and am exclusively watching the following:

"The Amazing Race" - still like the Globetrotters, even after that hilarious heckling of Mikah on the water slide; this last episode was awesome too
"Desperate Housewives" - one of those shows I wonder why I'm still watching, but I always do

"Brothers & Sisters" - a little bored, but loving the Sarah/Luke storyline

"Glee" - REALLY loving it, can't wait for the next episode (11/11) with a "Defying Gravity" duet!!!

"America's Next Top Model" - please kick off that stupid Erin!!!

"Parks & Rec" - this show is getting better -- I still think everyone should check it out

"The Office" - getting a little tired, but I'll always heart it

"30 Rock" - actually, I've only seen one episode!!! I need to get caught up.

"Mad Men" - totally behind on this too. John and I will watch "Mad Men" together and then an episode of "30 Rock" to cheer us up. We just haven't had the time.

Critics and viewers are raving about "Modern Family" so I tuned into that last night. It was pretty funny. I think I'll give it my 5 episode run to see if I'll season pass it. Anyone watching it?

I know there's SO much that I'm missing. I'll blog more later.

Blogcation

Instead of going into early, and ineffective blogging retirement, this time I'm announcing a blogcation. There's OODLES to Dish about (um... Letterman being a smarmy cheater, Jim & Pam's wedding tonight, etc.), but I need to take October off.

October is my FAVORITE month for many reasons. But this year, it's racing by me. We are replacing our roof which was supposed to happen this week, but it looks like it will be next.

We are going on a 10-day So Cal vacation (all you wanting to break into my house, be forewarned -- my tough neighbor, Jamie, is keeping an eye out!). We're SO excited for this trip. We haven't been on vacation since last October, so we're really ready to go. We will spend the bulk of it with John's siblings, their spouses and the nieces and nephews doing Sea World, Disneyland, the Beach, etc. For the last couple days of the trip, we'll be staying with my birth mom, Margaret, and her boyfriend, Billy. This is ALL Katie can take about right now. She definitely has her mom's obsessive genes.

I've got to get ALL my November issue work done before October 15th, because we come home the day before we go to press!

I'm also prepping my first Stake Cultural Arts event that will be held on November 6th.

When we get back from our trip, we host a big family Halloween party, so I'm trying to get everything ready now and the yard cleaned.

And, our anniversary is on October 28th. 11 years!!!

So, that's more info than you need to know, but needless to say, blogcation, here I come! I'll be back in November. Happy Haunting!

Jude's Thursday Dish #48 (REALLY cold leftovers)

I don't think I've ever been 2 days late on the Dish. But, we had a terrible deadline week, so I'm now able to breathe and take a moment to do something else. I only have time for one quick Dish item, because we're getting ready to do a bunch of house stuff while we listen to conference.

This Roman Polanski thing makes me sick. I think all of us in the real world like to believe that celebrities really aren't that different than us. They just have fame and money. But when something like this comes up, once again, I'm totally reminded how amoral Hollywood can be. Defending a child molester/rapist by signing a petition? Shame on all those who support him. Chris Rock said it best on his interview with Jay Leno (no, I'm still banning the show, but I read this):

"This Polanski thing got me, man," Rock said. "What the hell? People are defending Roman Polanski 'cause he made some good movies?"

"Yeah, I don't get it," Leno added, before Rock continued on.

"Are you kidding me? He made good movies 30 years ago, Jay. Come on! Even Johnnie Cochran don't have the nerve to go, 'Well, did you see O.J. play against New England?' "

That's all I got -- have a great weekend!

The Buddy Walk

Last Saturday, we attended our first Down Syndrome Buddy Walk for my nephew, Mitchell. What an event! There was a carnival (with awesome prizes - Mitchell got a big Winnie the Pooh stuffed animal and Katie got a Ty Beanie Baby -- at the FISH POND!!!) and then, there was the Walk. Team Mitch Man was happy to be there to support our favorite guy.

Me and Mitch Man (ignore my stupid bent glasses -- it was bright and I needed something!)

Katie "helping" her cousin

Very patient boy waiting for his "U" face paint

Much happier with the whole get-up

Grandma Paula and the awesome Fish Pond prize

Mitchell and his B.F.F., Tommy

Katie and the Alta Hawk (boo!)

Baby brother Jack slept through the whole thing

Mitchell loved hearing everyone cheer "Mitch Man! Mitch Man!" as we entered the starting line

Mitchell and his Uncle Aaron

Jude's Thursday Dish #47

Lunch, er breakfast, rush today! Utah Family magazine is FINALLY going glossy. No more newsprint! Which after 15 years and my 4 years of employment is VERY cool. But, my boss made the decision 2 weeks before deadline. All our ads need to be resized, editorial streamlined, etc. Since we all wear many hats there, as most of you know, I also sell on top of my editorial duties. We all sell. That's what happens when you work for a small business. So, everything needs to be done tomorrow, so I can proof layout on Monday and we go to print! Look for us conference weekend! We're also going to be having City Weekly add us to 400 of their high profile, public drop-off locations around SLC. I hope we'll be hard to miss.

So, here's some quick Dish today:

- LOVED "The Office" premiere. That episode was CLASSIC "Office" with Michael being extremely awkward. I love contained episodes where everyone is involved. I hope they keep it up. Last season felt very "Jump the Sharky" near the end. Watch season 1 & 2 episodes and you'll see what I mean.

- Speaking of old "Office" eps, I'm so happy that KJZZ is doing re-runs from 10 - 11 p.m. each night. I've exhausted "Everybody Loves Raymond" and "Sex and the City" on TBS. I think I've seen every episode of SATC a half dozen times by now. I need something new. I can't watch news at 10 p.m. It freaks me out and I can't sleep, so sitcoms are the way to go!

- "Parks & Rec" was so funny. If you didn't see Amy Poehler's Leslie Knope singing "Poker Face" drunk, then you missed out.

- I promised I'd tame the "Glee" references, but can I just say? "Single Ladies" last night killed!

- The Emmy's were much better than last year. Liked having the different genres be awarded all together, the stage was awesome, the P.C. guy doing random trivia -- very funny. Could definitely leave out the mini-series genre -- make them go to the "Schmemmy's" (Creative Arts Emmy's) as Kathy Griffin would call them. Thoughts on winners:

* Although I adore Alec Baldwin in 30 Rock, I was really hoping someone else would win just to mix it up.

* Same goes for "The Amazing Race" - love the show (it premieres this Sunday!) and I realize it's terribly difficult to produce, but yawn... let someone else win.

* Annoyed that Toni Collette beat out all those other great ladies. Same goes for Jon Cryer and that stupid "Malcolm in the Middle" guy for beating my hubby-in-another-life Jon Hamm.

* THRILLED (I actually shouted out loud) that Michael Emerson finally got the kudo's he deserved for playing Benry on "Lost". He was so gracious and perfect in his speech. Too bad that's all the love "Lost" got.

* Also SO happy that Kristin Chenowith (aka the Original Glinda from "Wicked") won for "Pushing Daisies". I miss that show. I'm just happy Kristin will be on "Glee" next week. Oops, another reference.

* I thought the glasses thing for the best supporting actress nominees was really cute, even with pole-up-her-butt Vanessa Williams pretending she refused to do it. But better still was Sarah Silverman's stache. Genius. I hate her, but that was REALLY funny.

* I really liked Neil Patrick Harris. Hosting gigs are brutal. No one is ever happy. Way to go, Doogie!

That's it for this week!

Jude's Thursday Dish #46

First matter of business, I've forgiven John. But enough of that, there is a LOT to dish on. It's been a busy Pop Culture Week.

1. ORY MAINE!!!! That would be Patrick Swayze. Again, someone who I totally grew up with died prematurely. It's so strange. My best friends Leslie, Anne-Katherine, and I were OBSESSED with the mini-series "North and South" parts 1 & 2 (part 3 sucked, and Patrick Swayze wasn't in it). This show was his big break. He was 30 when he started it and even though he had appeared as secondary characters in other films, this is what put him on the map and led him to "Dirty Dancing." He played Ory Maine, the Maine character - ha ha. It was just a Civil War soap, but he was actually really good in it. The dialogue could be cheesy "I'm worried about the children, the ones you ain't giving me!" (said by Justin, played by David Carradine -- another person who died too young, but I can't say I'm really sorry about him). There was this sex scene between Leslie Anne Down and Patrick Swayze that by today's standards isn't anything worse than you'd see on a daytime soap. But back then, it was kind of racy (think how "Thornbirds" was when that came out). We SO loved it. Even now we're older, we still talk about it and A-K and I even had a marathon, but FFed through it (each part was 24 hours! long). Leslie and I are discussing another one to memorialize our Ory. There's my favorite Patrick Swayze memory. It really is sad. I love that he was married and devoted to the same woman for like 30 years, which is unheard of in Hollywood. RIP, Patrick.

2. Okay, so yes... Kanye is an idiot. What he did to Taylor Swift was obnoxious and classless. He was obviously drunk or on something. Taylor handled the situation like a real pro for being only 19. BUT, I think the media crucifixion of him is out of control. Honestly, how many times does the guy need to apologize? Don't make a bigger deal out of it than it was. Let those two work it out. This goes back to my earlier post about forced apologies. I swear, let people apologize if they mean it, not because they are guilted into it! He may be truly sorry, but as we know, celebrities/politicians, etc. HAVE to apologize or they are run out on a rail. This is what bugs me about our uber-politically correct society. I'm not saying we should be allowed to run around and behave badly without consequences or apologizing when we've offended, but our society is so L.T.B.O. that there's 0 freedom of speech! Anyway, I'm on a tangent. I will say that I thought it was HILARIOUS that President Obama called him a "jackass" off the record and ABC's Terry Moran Tweeted it. Again, he/ABC was forced to apologize, but I'm just cynical enough to think that ABC was probably thrilled he did it, just for the publicity -- maybe TOLD him to and said, "We'll apologize later." Maybe that's how I should start behaving. Do stupid things and think, "I'll just say sorry later" like when you think, "Oh, I'll sin and repent later!"

3. When I heard Jessica Simpson's little pup got taken by a coyote, I got all teary! Not that I like JS at all, but how awful is that! It's Meryl Streep "the dingo ate my baby" all over again. Since I've totally become one of those "my dog is my baby" people, it really made me sad. I opened my fat mouth yesterday and started telling the story to my S.I.L. Libby (talk about someone who is a "my dog is my baby" person) and Katie overheard me. She burst into tears, ran to her room screaming and slammed the door. She was furious with me for telling her that and cried for 15 minutes. Call child protective services.

4. I promise for all you non-"Gleekers" out there, I won't talk about "Glee" every week. I just have to do a quick follow-up. Last night's episode was great. I feel like it's moving into it's groove. Not so over-the-top (they've established that) and a little less satire. Not saying that won't happen, in the future, but it seems like they are making it a little more real. Fortunately last night, Terry (the wife) wasn't as obnoxious as earlier episodes. I like the complicated quadrangle. Loved seeing Mercedes get to shine. I absolutely love that Will is stuck in the late 80's/early 90's. That's so my generation. He's into disco revival and his songs of choice were "This is how we do it", "Poison" and my 90's guilty pleasure, "I Wanna Sex You Up." The latter just made me smile. The "Acafellas" were hilarious with the addition of the Cougar lover kid and that creepy ex-teacher. Josh Groban has some acting chops. Love Victor Garber. I hope people stick with this show because not every episode can have a "Don't Stop Believin'" moment. However, I understand if people feel it's too sexual. It's definitely not for young teens. Fortunately, last night was a lot tamer than last week. It was on par for primetime TV. But I understand if it's too much for some viewers. There... I promise, that's it for now (maybe).

5. What do they call NBC's comedy line-up now? It's not Must See TV, but Comedy Night Done Right? Anyway, who cares?!!! It's the return of "The Office" and "Parks and Recreation." I gushed about "P&R" in an early post ( was going to link to it, but I don't have the patience right now to find it). If you haven't seen it, you should definitely DVR it and give it a chance. Remember, 5 episode trial before you dump it. I'm looking forward to the "SNL Weekend Update" (I heard Tina Fey might make a Sarah Palin appearance) and I'm going to try out Joel McHale's new comedy "Community." Just bummed that "30 Rock" doesn't start until something like mid-October.

Quick bits:

- The Emmys are on Sunday. I heart them! Can't wait to see "30 Rock" and "Mad Men" sweep all the competition. But, I would love a little surprise. Benry MUST win from "Lost"

- Pictures of Chris Brown doing his community service makes me giggle. What a D.B.

- Not going to support Leno hogging up the 9 p.m. time slot that could go to cool shows.

- I casually pop in to "The Biggest Loser". Didn't it premiere this week? Should I watch?

- Katie and I watched "The Princess Diaries: 2" for the first time last weekend. Chris Pine ("Star Trek" hottie) was in it. Kind of fun to see him before he was famous. And with brown hair.

- Michael Douglas is going to play Liberace in an upcoming movie with Matt Damon as his lover. I'm just not seeing it. MD just doesn't have a lot of range; he's really going to have to sell me on that idea.

- John is devouring "The Lost Symbol" and I'm impatiently waiting for him to finish. Anyone reading it?

That's it for this week!

Replying to Comments

I'm totally cracking up on the comments left from the White Trash! pet peeve post. But I have a question. How do you reply to someone who's left you a comment? If I comment on MY comments, you won't see it, right? Do I have to go to your blog and leave a comment? So confused!

Quickly, a new pet peeve to add to my list. When your husband says he's going to get gas in the car the night before and you jump in the car the next morning, late to take your daughter to school, and realize the car is COMPLETELY on empty. Your daughter is freaking out in the car you're going to run out of gas and you stall in the school parking lot. You barely make it up to the Maverick, but since you need a new cell phone and you haven't replaced it yet, and you don't have a purse because you were ONLY taking your kid to school, you have to dig up 50 cents and call said husband on the public phone. He drives up, ANNOYED WITH YOU (Hello?) for making him late to work. You swipe his debit card and when you hand it back to him before you start pumping, your sale is cancelled. Oh, and he's already driven off! Then, you have to dig up 50 more cents, call him and make him come back.

Obviously, that's not a pet peeve. Just the crappy thing that happened to me this morning. John is SO on my list.

White Trash!

I can't say this without thinking of Mister formerly of 101.9, The End. He and Chunga were on a remote at Disneyland and Mister saw Paris Hilton walking by. He screamed "White Trash!" at her and mortified Chunga. Later, they had Mister record it and they would play it all the time. It totally amuses me.

Anyway, I've mostly been blogging about Pop Culture and our summer activities. I realized it's been a LONG time since I vented about pet peeves. I mean, what's a blog without a pet peeve rant once in a while? So, this is kind of weird, but one of my biggest pet peeves is White Trash.

I consider myself a really tolerant person. I try to be really accepting. I'm a little L.T.B.O. (looking to be offended) when people use slurs or make inappropriate jokes. I credit this to my completely irreverent brother, Dave, who I swear, does this just to get a rise out of me. Since no one is without prejudice, I know I fall short sometimes. I have a really hard time tolerating people who know better, but make bad choices. It's easier for me understand someone who perhaps doesn't have the knowledge or experience then for someone who's had it all, but thrown it away. But I digress. The other thing I can't tolerate is White Trash. I know, I know. That's a slur and I shouldn't use it, but really... how else can you describe it? Anyway, this isn't about being of lower financial or economic status. I mean, I am fully aware I'm probably one big accident, one financial tragedy or one layoff (me or John) away from that. What drives me crazy is the lower social or cultural behavior that seems to accompany some of these people. Just because you don't have money doesn't mean you have to act like it. These are the people that wear their lower class on their sleeve. And most do it with pride. The neighbors across the street fall into this category. They seem happy as clams not working all day, sitting on their porch in their living room furniture, smoking and BBQ-ing. The girl will come out in what looks like a bra with fabric flowing down her midriff, but when I look closer it's actually some kind of weird bustier shirt that looks like it was shredded. Aaah, I love the Sugarhood.

Why is it that when you go on a family outing to a place that costs a pretty penny (i.e. Lagoon, water park, concerts, events, etc.), there are always a lot of white trash there? I'm sure this is coming off really judgmental, but I'm talking about these groups of people who really don't seem like they have jobs, let alone the money to pay for an expensive activity. This has been on my mind this summer with several things we've attended. And I'm saying this because I, for one, rarely spend on things like this because I have a lot of trade through work. When I have to pay for a family outing that's pricey, I struggle a lot because honestly, I don't have a lot of extra income to pay for it. Example: Lagoon. We haven't been in a couple of years and the last time, we got to go for free. This summer, my friend Leslie and I decided to take advantage of a Stake Lagoon Day and took her two kids and my Katie. Even with the discount passes, the whole experience was a fortune. But what shocked me more were all these W.T. people there buying a ton of food and dropping money to play games. And I know you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, but these people seriously didn't look like they had the money. I've seen this a lot lately. I understand when you go somewhere like Disneyland, because let's face it -- all kinds of families, no matter what their income -- will make a vacation work even if they don't have the money. But maybe I'm totally off base. It's just really curious to me.

I googled to see what the difference was between White Trash and Redneck. First of all, white trash was coined in the 1800's and was a very derogative term. I guess ultimately while White Trash and Rednecks live in the same places and look the same, in the South, Rednecks are more fun loving, happy, religious and productive. White Trash are more hateful -- some would support the KKK, trespass on people's property to hunt, void of religion, etc. A Redneck is happy to be called such, White Trash would want to kill you for saying it. Since we don't really have Rednecks in SLC, I think we basically make a blanket classification as people being White Trash.

Does this bug anyone else? And if not, what is one of your similar pet peeves?